There was a time where, no matter what tore us apart or how long we weren’t together, we somehow always made it back to each other. I had convinced myself that I hated you. And yet I find myself comparing other women I encounter to you. I want one of them to stick out and somehow be better than you in every way. It’s driving me insane.
Call it loneliness or stupidity…or maybe even say some part of me still longs for you. I guess…maybe deep down, a little piece of me wishes that the universe would have us cross paths again. That maybe this last try, we’d get it right and just be happy together.
Give me a sign. I can’t be the only one feeling this way.
“Try not to care what I think.” Dude…I look up to you. Of course I care what you think. Maybe I’m just a baby about it, but that hurt. I aim for your approval because you are exactly what I aim to be myself. You are the me that I try so hard to become. You’ve told me yourself the reason we get along is because you see your old self in me.
I’ve never had older siblings or figures like that. I take what you say to heart. You can’t just encourage me, build me up, even look out for me like you have been and then tell me not to care what you think. Not only are you my mentor, you’re the big brother I’ve always wanted. You say I’m your younger brother, but I feel as if you don’t even want to be bothered associating with me anymore.
I guess I’ll just start backing off. I’ve learned how to function alone.
I already know I’ll be an amazing dad.
Yeah, I’m that confident about it.
But I also believe that I’ll never cease to be as strange and goofy as I am today. So I hope my kids will see me as fun.
Because I will use these abnormal powers to make sure that every day of their lives has at least one reason for a big, cheesy smile.
Night blogers really speak to me
like… what even
inspires you to
write such things
that dont make
WHAT SO EVER
“I try to find it within myself to know and accept my place…but is it so wrong to desire more?”